The Chronicles of the FACE Family
by SilverFrostSupreme
Summary: Get ready to enter the f***ed up life of the FACE family. It was made by me and a friend. Warning! There is Yaoi content and mpreg. Hetalia Characters (c) Hidekaz Himaruya
1. Baby Years

A/N: This was done by me and my best friend. The Pairings are FrUK and Americest

My friend being Canada and France, her OCs and occasionally other side characters

Me being America and England, my OCs, and occasionally other side characters

_The Italics are thoughts and/or twin talk between America and Canada_

* * *

**England**: *is tending to **Canada** in the middle of the night*

**Canada**:*Nomming on fist*

**England**: *smiles tiredly and rocks him, trying to make him go back to sleep*

**Canada**: *Reaches out at him and waves fist around*

**England**: *sits down in the rocking chair and pull out a **fairy** tale book* do you want mummy to read to you poppet?

**Canada**:*Focused on something and reaches for it*

**England**: *looks at him* what are you looking at? *sees **Fairy*** oh. You found your first **fairy**. *smiles and kisses his head gently*

**Canada**: *Reaches for the **fairy***

**Fairy**:*Smiles and giggles*

**England**: don't hurt her Cana...

**Fairy**: *Lands next to **Canada** and puts hand on his*

**Canada**:*Giggles and babbles*

**England**: *smiles and watches*

**Fairy**:*Looks at **England** and back at **Canada** and smiles at him*

**Canada**:*Looks up at **England** and looks at book reaching for it*

**Fairy**: Read it to him... *Sits on **England**'s shoulder*

**England**: *smiles and holds **Canada** in one arm and the book in the other and begins reading*

**Canada**: *Blinks and smiles*

**Fairy**:*Dozing off and shakes head awake*

-later-

**Fairy**:*Asleep on **England**'s shoulder*

**Canada**:*Asleep*

**England**: *asleep in the rocking chair*

**France**:*Walks in and stares for a bit before taking a picture* Mon Amour...

**England**: *twitches a bit and yawns*

**France**: *Kisses him*

**Fairy**:*Wakes up* What's that sm- Oh... Yuck he smells like cheese... *Flies over to **Canada** and smiles looking at him*

**Canada**: zzz...

**England**: *wakes up and looks at **France***

**France**: *Smiles happily and kisses him again*

**England**: *kisses back tiredly*

**Fairy**:*Whispers to **Canada***

**Canada**:*Moves around and looks at **France** and starts crying*

**England**: *pulls back and holds **Canada** close* shhh..it's ok Cana...it's just papa

**France**:* Looks at **Canada** and smiles*

**Canada**:*Waves fist at him*

**England**: *smiles* can you get their bottles. **America**'s gonna wake up any time now.

**France**: 5...4...3...2...1...

**America**: *wakes up and cries*

**France**: *Chuckles* I will feed **America**... *Walks in kitchen and gets both their bottles* Hey **England**...Take the day off... You need sleep when you are done feeding **Canada** leave the rest to me...

**Canada**:*Babbles*

**America**: *cries*

**England**: *Gets up, picks up **America** in his free arm, and holds both of them, smiles at them*

**Canada**: *Reaches toward **America** and babbles*

**America's Fairy**:*Sitting on **America**s head*

**England**: *smiles* it seems that your **fairy** has shown up too **America**. *smiles and walks around the nursery with them*

**America**: *looks up at the **fairy***

**America's Fairy**:*waves*

**Canada**:*Trying to reach **America** and slightly whines*

**England**: *sits down and lets them sit on his lap*

**Canada**: *Whines more*

**France**:*Takes **America** from **England** and hands **England** **Canada**'s bottle*

**Canada**:*Watches **France** Take **America***

**America**: *reaches for his bottle*

**England**: *holds **Canada**'s bottle out to him*

**Canada**:*Looks past it at **France** and **America** and looks up at **England** then at bottle*...*Reaches for it*

**England**: *puts it in his mouth* here you go sweetie

**America**: *whines*

**France**:*Puts it in his mouth* Non. *

**Canada**:*Feeds and closes eyes*

**England**: *smiles*

**America**: *feeds*

**Canada**: *Finishes feeding halfway and pushes bottle away*

**France**:*Chuckles at **America***

**America**: *finishes the bottle*

**England**: *put the bottle down*

**France**: Now go and rest Mon amour...

**Canada**:*Reaches for **America***

**England**: no. You can handle both of them alone.

**Canada**: *babbles*

**France**: Yes, I can...

**England**: No. I'm helping. *holds **Canada***

**France**: Come on **England** please your going to kill yourself over this...

**England**: I am a mother. I have to be there for my children.

**France**: You will be just taking a small break at least go take a nap or do something other than stress yourself over this...

**England**: no.

**France**:... *Shakes head sighing*

**Canada**:*Looks at **France** and at **England** before crying*

**England**: shhh. *holds him close and rocks him* it's ok.

**France**:*Taking **America**s feet out of his mouth* Non.

**America**: *stares at him then continues to nom on his foot*

**England**: *rocks **Canada***

**Canada**:*Starts to calm down*

**France**:*Takes it out again* I said non. _

**America**: *whines and thrashes his feet and hands around*

**England**: *smiles at **Canada** and kisses his head*

**France**: *Sighs and put **America**s foot in his mouth* Fine... However, it is not going to help you with anything...

**America**: *giggles*

**England**: *smiles at **America***

**America**: *looks at **England** and gurgles*

**Canada**: *Remains silent*...

**France**: Babies are weird... *Shakes head*

**England**: They're adorable. *Smiles at the boys*

**America**: *gurgles*

**England**: *smiles* yes that's right **America**.

**America**: *giggles*

**Canada**: *Waves fist around and hits **England**'s chest whining and starts thrashing about*

**France**: So weird...

**England**: *looks down at **Canada*** shhh. It is ok. *picks him up under the arms and gently gives him an Eskimo kiss*

**Canada**:*hugs **England**'s face giggling*

**America**: *noms on his fist*

**England**: *smiles and Kisses **Canada**'s stomach*

**Canada**: *waves fist around babbling at **America** agitated before squealing and giggles at **England***

**France**: Heh... They already fight

**England**: *blows on his stomach*

**Canada**:*Giggles uncontrollably*

**France**:*tosses **America** slightly*

**England**: *blows on **Canada**'s stomach and holds him*

**Canada**:*Laughs*

**England**: *smiles and laughs a bit*

**France**:*Chuckles at **Canada***

**Canada**: *Still agitated at **America** and babbles at him*

**England**: *smiles*

**Canada**: *Eyes turn a darker purple for a sec and babbles thrashing fist about*

**France**: It's almost like he is cussing **America** out...

**England**: *chuckles a bit*

**America**: *nomming on fist*

**Canada**:*Becomes more agitated* _IM GOING TO END YOU!_

**America**: *looks over, giggles and continues nomming on fist*

**Canada**: _I'LL KICK YOUR A**! YOU WILL REGRET IT!_

**England**: *smiles at them* they're adorable. *sits in the floor and plays with **Canada***

**Canada**: *Pouting*

**England**: *smiles and pokes his cheeks*

**America**: *laughs*

**Canada**: _Your laughing now! WAIT TILL WE GET IN THE CRIB!_

**England**: *picks up **Canada*** I think you need a nap

**America**: _Sucker..._

**France**: You too big guy...

**Canada**: *Gives him and evil look in eye*_ Haha. See you there!_

**America**: _SH*T!_

**England**: *lays **Canada** in the crib and then turn on the mobile that makes sounds*

**France**:*Sets **America** in crib* I guess it is good for you two to sleep together...

**Canada**:*Giggles at him*_Im gonna f*ck you up!_

**America**: _GET ME OUT OF HERE!_ *cries*

**England**: *strokes his head* it's ok.

**America**: _Mommy person get me out of here! _*cries and tries to reach for him*

**England**: shh... it's ok. *gives him a stuffed animal*

**America**: *throws it* _MOMMY GET ME OUT OF HERE!_ *cries*

**England**: *sighs and picks him up* shhh...

**Canada**: *clinging to **America**s legs* _You ain't going anywhere! You belong to me now b*tch!_ (Narrator: Baby Logic)

**England**: *looks at **Canada*** babies can be weird. *gently pulls **Canada** off and holds **America** in his arms*

**America**: _Thank you for saving me from my doom..._*clings to him*

**Canada**: *Looks at **England***_ I hope you die._*Looks at **America** and flips him off*

**England**: *sees that and his eyes widen* **FRANCE**! *puts **America** down and pulls **France** out of the roomto strangle him*

**America**: _F**K I AM DEAD! SH*T!_

-a bit later-

**Canada**: *Has **America** squished against the side of the crib*_ You have a big a** head...It saved you._

**America**: *cries*_ I NEVER DID ANYTHING TO YOU!_

**England**: *walks in and stares* WTF? *walks over and pulls **Canada** out of the crib* what is wrong with you today little Mr. Attitude?

**Canada**: *Looks down at **America**_* Im not done with you_ *Looks at **England***_ I hope you die...tonight... I don't care when... It has to be tonight... I wanna watch Dora..._

-a few months later-

**England**: *bouncing **Canada** on his knee*

**Canada**: _You didn't die... So your cool... I guess..._*Eyes turn normal and blinks*

**France**: So cute...

**America**: *lays on **France***_So you're Papa? ...you smell like cheese...it's nasty..._*stares at **France***

**England**: *smiles and kisses **Canada**'s head*

**America**: _Papa...you smell...take a bath..._*looks at him* papa

**England**: *looks at him*

**Canada**:*Hugs **England**'s face*

**France**: _He is so heavy _ You're so skinny...

**America**: papa! *grabs his shirt and plays with it*

**England**: That was his first word...

**Canada**:...Murder...

**France**: *Eyes widen* That want me! I DIDN'T TEACH HIM THAT IT WAS YOU!

**England**: *puts **Canada** and **America** in the playpen and tackles **France*** YOU BLOODY FROG!

**France**: Ack!

**England**: YOU STUPID GIT! HOW DARE YOU TEACH HIM THAT WORD!

**Canada**:*Looks at **America*** Murder...

**America**: *whimpers* papa...

**Canada**: *Hugs **America*** ...

**America**: *whimpers*

**Canada**:... *Lets go and looks down*

**America**: HERO!

**Canada**: Kindness...

**England**: *kicks **France** in the balls* THERE! NOW NO MORE CHILDREN!

**Canada**:...*Kicks **America** in the balls as well*

**America**: *cries*

**England**: *looks up at them* What's wrong poppet?

**America**: _It hurts...so...bad..._

**Canada**: *Stares at **America** and looks down and sits in corner* Sorry...

**England**: *looks at them then at **France*** YOU'RE A BAD INFLUENCE!

**Canada**:*Cries from the loudness* B*****...

**England**: ...NO SEX FOR 5 YEARS!

**Canada**: Sex?

**England**: ..*kicks **France** in the balls and pulls him out of the room*

**America**: sex? *looks at **Canada*** _What is mommy and papa saying?_

**Canada**:*Nods* Sex..._I dunno... Im curious about sex..._


	2. Childhood

** -Years later- **

**France**: *Cooking Spaghetti*

**Canada**: *Watching*...Hmm...

**Kumajiro**: *Sniffs*

**England**: *is sitting in the living room reading*

**America**: *playing with his cowboy action figures*

**Canada**: Papa... can I wear my mounty suit to dinner?

**France**: Ask your mother, the black sheep Europe.

**Canada**: Mkay! *Runs in the room* Mama!

**England**: *looks up* yes **Canada**?

**America**: *yells as his plays with the Indians and laughs*

**Canada**: Can I please wear my monty suit to dinner? *Smiles hopefully*

**England**: as long as you be careful not to make a mess all over it. *messes with his hair gently*

**Canada**: *giggles* Thanks mama! Oh, and by the way... why does papa call you the black sheep of Europe? *Tilts head*

**England**: *stiffens* **Canada** why don't you go find your mounty costum and put it on while I go talk to your papa...*stands up and walks to the kitchen* **FRANCE**!

**America**: Mom is loud.

**Canada**: *Looks at **America** and then runs upstairs to put on mounty suit*

**France**: Ah! Bonjour Mon Amour.

**England**: WHY DID YOU CALL ME THAT NAME AGAIN AFTER I TOLD YOU NOT TO FROG FACE!?

**France**: Keep your voice down... Your going to scare the kids...Jeez, loud mouth...

**England**: I will not keep my voice down! *grabs his neck and chokes him*

**France**:Ack! Quit it! Your getting your filthy hands on me! I just took a shower!

**Canada**: *Walks down in his mounty suit and walks in kitchen and stiffens* Mama?

**England**: *his eyes widen and he slaps **France** once more before walking to him* I'm sorry you had to see that poppet... *walks out*

**France**: *Rubs cheek watching*

**Canada**: Papa? Are you okay?

**France**: Huh? Oh yeah! *Smiles* Im fine. Your mom is just too moody. *Chuckles and picks him up* Don't worry 'bout me...

**Canada**: *Clings* Kay...

**England**: *grumbles and walks back in the living room and reads again*

**America**: *looks at him*

**France**: *Walks in holding **Canada***

**Canada**: *Clinging to him tightly*...

**France**: *Sits in chair with **Canada** on lap*

**Canada**: *Looks at **England** and looks at **America***...

**America**: **Canada**! Come play with me I'm bored!

**England**: *looks at him slightly*

**Canada**: A-Alright... *Jumps down from **France**s lap and walks up to **America***

**France**: *Smiles watching*

**America**: You be the Indians and I'll be the cowboys!

**England**: *rolls his eyes a bit and reads*

**Canada**: Alright... *Grabs an Indian action figure*

**France**: **America** be nice... *Sits back*

**America**: I will papa! *gathers his cowboys*

**England**: something's burning...and I'm not cooking...

**France**: Oh what a shock it's almost like the moment you start it's already burnt! *Stands up and stretches before walking to kitchen humming frère Jacques*

**Canada**: *Examines the figure* How do I play? *Not sure to do*

**America**: Easy! You stay there like helpless cowards and I'll shoot you!

**England**: **America**!

**Canada**: It's fine mommy. If that's the rules I'll gladly follow... *Smiles*

**England**: That's not fair!

**America**: so what?

**Canada**: *Looks down at the action figure with the same smile* ...

**England**: *sighs and picks him up* **America** no trying to trick your brother into playing unfair games. *holds **Canada** close*

**Canada**: Mommy it's fine! I wanna play! If that's how he wants to play then im fine with it... I only care if he's happy...

**England**: *sighs* I don't want your hurt poppet.

**Canada**: *Shrugs* Couple of scrapes never hurt right?

**England**: *sighs and puts him down, goes to the kitchen to make tea*

**France**: *cooking*

**Canada**: All right... I am ready...

**America**: ok! *plays*

**England**: *grumbles, complaining about how **America** plays unfair games with **Canada***

**Canada**: *Does as he was told*

**France**: Stressing over it will make you ugly... *Smirks and says something under breath after that*

**England**: *growls* shut up frog!

**France**: *Smiles and turns off stove* Makes you wonder though huh?

**England**: if I am so ugly that means you are too and our children! *grumbles*

**France**: *Chuckles* Im too handsome for that petty come back and the kids are beautiful...plus... I was kidding... *Watches **Canada** and **America** with a loving smile*

**England**: Yeah sure you were Frog face!

**France**: *Walks up to him and kisses * Don't be like that. You sometimes act like an old lady...

**England**: Don't kiss me! *slaps him*

**France**: *Rubs cheek and sighs* Also... we shouldn't fight in front of the kids... you scared **Canada**...

**England**: *growls* bloody b******

**France**: Just saying... *Finishes cooking*

**-later-**

**Canada**: *Puts on mounty hat and smiles* Papa can I go out and explore?

**France**: Not tonight...It's getting late...

**England**: *pets his cat and watches **America***

**America**: *is playing with his lasso*

**Canada**: Okay... I'll be in my room... *Smiles innocently and walks upstairs*

**France**: Okay. *Watches **England** and **America***

**England**: *glares at **France***

**Canada**: *Climbs out of window and lands in a bush* Ow... *Crawls out of bush and dusts off suit and knees*

**France**: *Looks toward the back of the house*...?

**England**: *raises a brow*

**America**: I'm going to get the monster outside! *runs out with his rope and ends up roping **Canada*** LOOK WHAT I FOUND! *drags him back inside the house*

**France**: *Looks at **Canada** and sighs shaking head*

**Canada**: *Looking down not wanting to look at **England** or **France*** ...

**England**: ...

**America**: I got the monster outside!

**Canada**: ...*Tries pulling away from **America*** Fatty!

**France**: **Canada**!

**England**: **Canada**!

**America**: I'm not fat I'm fluffy!

**Canada**: Big foot!

**France**: **Canada**!

**England**: *unties **Canada** and takes the rope from **America***

**France**: **Canada**! Go to your room and go to your room and get change then bring me your mounty outfit*

**Canada**: But-!

**France**: Now! *Crosses arms*

**Canada**: *Tears up and runs upstairs*

**England**: and you go to your room for bed **America**.

**America**: BUT!

**England**: No buts. GO.

**Canada**: *Couple minutes later walks down with pajamas on and looking at Mounty hat and holding suit in arms* Here papa... *Hands him suit and hat*

**France**: Alright... *Kisses his head and hugs* Good night.

**Canada**: Night... *Walks upstairs sulking*

**England**: *sighs and leans against **France***

**France**: *Sets suit and Mounty hat down and hugs **England***

**Canada**: *Glaring at **America***...

**England**: *hugs him back*

**America**: *is asleep already and drooling on his pillow*

**Canada**: He is such an idiot... *Turns back to face him*

**France**: *Sighs and rubs his back* That's a first...

**England**: *nods*

**France**: Guess it's just part of growing up... *Nuzzles his neck*

**England**: *nods and clings to **France***

**France**: *Kisses his neck and smiles*...

**England**: *gasps*

**France**: *Bites down the spot he kissed and starts sucking on his neck*

**England**: *moans softly*

**France**: *Smirks and slightly chuckles * Your so sensitive...

**England**: F*** you

**France**:*Pins him against the couch and smiles innocently* Oh...? What was that?

**-Later-**

**England**: *glares at him and slaps his a** *

**France**: Ow! Hey! *Punches his thigh slightly* Hope you feel that in the morning!

**England**: *knees him in the balls*

**France**: Ow! What the hell!? You know what you can sleep on the couch! Alone! *Walks upstairs and walks in bedroom and shakes head*

**England**: b*******!

**France**: GO TO BED! *Lays on bed and yawns*

**-a few weeks later-**

**Canada**: *Sitting on couch and stomach growles from lack of food *...

**England**: *sighs* here **Canada** *gives him the suit*

**America**: That's not fair!

**England**: you're not fair!

**America**: Shut up IggyBrows!

**England**: You little

**Canada**:...Wheres the hat... *Glares at him*

**England**: it's right here *gives him the hat*

**Canada**:*Puts on hat and smiles* Thanks...

**France**:...

**England**: *kisses his head and coughs violently*

**France**: *Looks at **England*** Amour? *Walks up to him*

**Canada**: Hey **America** you wanna go explore with me?

**England**: *coughs and covers his mouth*

**America**: Yeah!

**Canada**:*Takes his hand and walks out* Come on.

**France**: *Feels his head*

**America**: *follows*

**England**: I'm fine frog... It's allergies...

**France**: Its not allergies... You think I don't know what allergies is?

**Canada**: Ah! I forgot...*Runs in and runs upstairs to **England**s and **France**s room and looks around before getting **America**s Lasso and running out*

**England**: I'm fine you bloody frog.

**America**: AWESOME! THANKS BRO! *glomps him*

**Canada**: *Smiles and hugs back happily * I just don't like seeing you upset...

**America**: *runs off*

**Canada**: *Follows*

**France**:...**England**...

**England**: I'm fine. No sex for a month. *goes to read*

**France**: I can deal with that...

**England**: 6 months.

**France**: Whatever will make you happy...

**England**: I hate you, you bloody b******

**France**: I love you too.

**Canada**:*Running through the forest trying to catch up wit **America*** How can a fatty run so fast...

**America**: I'M NOT FAT I AM FLUFFY! *runs faster*

**Canada**: **America**! Wait! Im sorry! Please wait!

**America**: *Runs*

**Canada**:*Trips and sprains wrist and eyes widen before letting out a scream*

**America**: **Canada**? *runs back*

**Canada**: *Crying holding wrist* M-My wrist!

**America**: *carries him home*

**Canada**: *Trembles in pain and clings to him crying*

**America**: *runs home*

**Canada**: P-Papa! Mama!

**France**: **Canada**? *Runs out*

**America**: He sprained his wrist

**France**: How!? *Takes him from **America***

**Canada**: We were playing and I tripped...

**America**: *nods*

**France**: *Sighs* Okay... *Takes **Canada** inside*

**Canada**: *Crying and clings to him*

**-later-**

**Canada**: *Has bandages wrapped around wrist sitting on bed looking down at the ground*

**France**: *sighs*

**England**: *sighs and sits next to **Canada***

**Canada**: Wheres **America**? *Looks around*

**America**: here *sits on his bed*

**Canada**: Oh. *Smiles and giggles*


	3. Going to War

**_-Couple hundred years later-_**

**England**: *is reading a spell book*

**Canada**: *Playing with Kumajiro*

-Phone rings-

**France**: I got it! *Answers* Hello? What? *Eyes widen* Are you serious? Yeah... I'll tell him... *Hangs up*...

**England**: What was it frog face?

**France**: *Whispers to **England*** The Germans attacked **Canada**'s borders so his boss wants him to go fight...

**Canada**:.. *Looking up at them*

**England**: *his eyes widen*

**Canada**: W-what? Mama? Papa?

**France**: *Looks at **Canada** then at **England***

**England**: ...

**France**: *Calls **America***...

**Canada**:*stands up and looks a **England*** Mama...Whats going on?

**England**: ...Germany is attacking your borders...Your boss wants you to fight...

**France**: THAT FAT A** BA****! *Sighs*

**Canada**: Oh okay... Well then I'll be gone for a while... *Walks upstairs and packs things*

**England**: *frowns and whimpers*

**France**: ... He won't last alone...

**Canada**: *Walks down with bags packed* Hey Mama Papa...

**France**: *Looks at **Canada***

**England**: *looks at him*

**Canada**: I'll be back... *Smiles and hugs both of them* I love you both!

**England**: *hugs him tightly*

**France**:*Hugs aswell* Be careful...

**Canada**: Don't worry... *Smiles* Im **Canada**. *Walks out*

**England**: *sobs*

**France**:*Hugs him with tears in eyes*

-years later-

**England**: *is knitting*

**France**: *Staring at the phone*

**England**: ...

-It rings-

**France**:*Answers at the first ring* HELLO!? Speaking...**Canada**? How are you...? *Smiles*

**England**: *looks at him*

**France**: That's great! I'll see ya soon!

**England**: so?

**France**: **Canada**s coming home! *Jumps up*

**England**: he is?!

**France**:*Nods smiling and about to call **America** but stops self and sighs* Yeah he's coming home! He's on a plane now...

**England**: *Smiles*

-Hours of argueing, cleaning, and other stuff-

?:*Knocks on door*

**France**:*Pushes **England** down* MOVE B*TCH! *Opens door and blinks* **Canada**?

**Canada**: Oh hi! *wearing glasses*

**France**: ?

**England**: **Canada** we're so glad you're home.*hugs him and then kicks **France** in the balls*

**Canada**:*Chuckles*

**France**:*Falls over* Ow...!

**Canada**: *walks in* Mama have you lost weight since I left you look better...

**England**: What is that supposed to mean?

**Canada**: Nothing. *Smiles and whispers to **France*** ..In particular

**France**:*Chuckles*

**England**: I can't help it that your father was cooking fatty foods! At least I wasn't pregnant!

**Canada**: Close your eyes and hold your breath... *Looks at him serious*

**England**: ...

**Canada**:... Have you gotten shorter...?

**England**: you grew...

**Canada**: Oh hey papa! I got to drink for the first time... I was forced to really... =_=

**England**: ..*hugs him tightly* I missed you so much **Canada**

**Canada**: Careful... I don't want you getting gas in your eyes.. *Smiles and hugs back slightly* I need a shower...

**England**: *Smiles and pulls back* of course...

**Canada**: *Kisses his head and runs off to take a shower*

**England**: *smiles*

-30 minutes later-

**Canada**: *Walks out without a shirt drying hair* Lets go golfing...

**France**: they broke the innocence of our son... ;-;* still thinking of when **Canada** was little and so innocent*

**England**: *clings to **France***

**Canada**: *Gasp* I want pancakes...

**France**: *sighs*Its like 2:30 am

**England**: *falling asleep on **France***

**Canada**: It's morning... Right?

**France**: Yeah...

**Canada**: So...Yeah... *Looks at **England***...

**France**:*Rubs **England**'s head*

**England**: *is asleep*

-Months later-

**Canada**:*Moving out*

**France**:*Crying* My Baby! Noo! My baby is leaving me!

**England**: *sobs hard*

**Canada**: Hey! Come on... I'll visit on holidays... *Hugs both of them smiling*

**France**: *Sniffles* MY BABY!

**England**: *clings to him*

**Canada**:*kisses both his and **England**'s head* Don't worry... Come on guys...

**England**: *sobs*

**Canada**: *Rubs his head* Mama... Please...

**England**: *sobs* you're all leaving me

**Canada**:... *Tears up* ...Mama... Im sorry... I don't want to but I have too...

**England**: *Sobs*

**Canada**: *Hugs him and cries* Mama...

**England**: *sobs*

**France**:*Takes a picture*...

**Canada**: I'm sorry mama...But I promise to be back and visit...

**England**: *Sobs*

**Canada**: B-Bye... *Cries and runs out*

**England**: *falls to his knees and sobs*

**France**:*tries to comfort him by kneeling next to him and rubbing his back*

**England**: *sobs and cover his face*

**Canada**: Im sorry...

**England**: *sobs*


	4. Halloween

**-Halloween night-**

**Canada**:*Drinking punch*

**France**: We look so cute together-

**England**: *pouts*

**America**: HEY DUDES!

**France**:Hi! It's good to see you...Wow you've gotten fatter...

**America**: I'M NOT FAT! I'M FLUFFY!

**England**: It's fat. Get over it.

**America**: So bitter. You know you don't have to be so bitter from your losses.

**England**: YOU DON'T GET IT SO JUST SHUT UP YOU BLOODY WANKER!

**Canada**: *Sees them and smiles* Mama!

**England**: **Canada**! *hugs him*

**Canada**:*Hugs back*

**France**: My my... **Canada** what are you wearing? *Chuckles slightly*

**Canada**: *Blushes* Japan asked me to wear it...

**England**: *sighs*

**Canada**: It's supposed to be meant for a girl... *Sighs embarrassed*

**England**: well we did expect you to be a girl...

**Canada**: That totally didn't hurt me deep... *Crosses arms*

**England**: Well...China said you were a girl...then you came out as a boy...

**Canada**: I hate you... *Pouts*

**England**: Blame China

**Canada**: *Looks at **America*** What are you supposed to be? A molester with a mask...? Oh no! I got this one! A escape Sex offender who hides his face with a mask! That's definitely you.

**America**: Says the girl

**Canada**: You jelly? *Pose*

**America**: no. Why couldn't you be a girl. I would love to have a hot sister.

**Canada**: So... Your calling me hot... Mama Im sorry but I gotta go over there I think I hear um... Japan! Bye!

**England**: *crosses his arms* stupid git **America**...

**America**: IF I'M STUPID I GET IT FROM YOU!

**Canada**: *Chops **America** with broom* J

**America**: GAH!

**Canada**: You could pull off a Godzilla costume eh?

**America**: NOT COOL MAN!

**England**: Get over yourself **America**.

**Canada**: I love you bro! *says innocently*

**France**: He is almost like a girl...

**England**: Well you being that father doesn't help much!

**France**: He does what he wants...

**England**: yeah sure. It's your f***ing genes

**France**: You say im a pretty girl~?

**England**: NO! I'm the woman in this relationship!

**Canada**: Aren't you proud...*Sees Russia dressed as Panda*...*Gasps and pushes **America** down* Move hooker! *GLOMPS RUSSIA*

**England**: WTF?

**Canada**: *Snuggling against Russia* So cute!

**France**: Russia hasn't killed him yet..

Narrator: Well done Russia actually supports **Canada**...

**England**: I want to go home

**France**: BUT WE JUST GOT HERE AND THERS UKRAINE!

**England**: you bloody frog.

**Canada**:*Flips off Romano and gets chased by him running by **England***ROMANOS TRYING TO RAPE ME!

**Romano**: *Stops in tracks* ASSHOLE!

**France**: Cana do you wanna stay at our house tonight?

**Canada**: No im staying at **America**s...

**England**: I'm going home. Stay here And get f***ed **France**. *leaves*

**France**: *walks after him* party pooper...

-_**later-**_

**England**: *picks up **America*** come on you bloody git. You're going home

**America**: GRANDMA IS IT COOKIE TIME?!

**Canada**: COOKIE TIME!

**America**: BEAVERS AND DUCKS AND WALNUTS AND GRANDMA!

**England**: they're so drunk...

**Canada**: I LOST MY HANDS! ;-; NOOO! *Puts hands on **England**'s face* Oh wait...

**America**: I CAN THAT'S CHEESEBURGER!

**Canada**: Mommy~ *Hic* Did you steal my hands? *Hic* *puts hand on his mouth* Shhhh...Its okay...I won't tell anyone... Psst! Bro! PSSSSST!

**America**: *runs out to the parking lot and points to a red semi* IT'S F***ING Optimus PRIME!

**Canada**: Papa...mama steals hands...

**France**: Oh shit.

**Canada**: I know... *Hic* HEY MAMA! HEY MAMA! HEY MAMA! MAMA! MOMMY! MOM!

**America**: BANANAFISH!

**CANADA**: *Looks at **America*** I'd tap that...

**America**: I'M GOING TO RAPE SOMEONE!

**Canada**: *rubs **England**'s face* Smooth ...Scratchy...Smooth...Scratchy! *GASP* There's a magical **fairy**! FUCKING TINKER BELL!

**America**: THE EMU SAYS YEAH!

**Canada**:*Sneaks up on **America** with a crowbar*

**America**: AGREE WITH THE EMU!

**Canada**:*Jumps on his back holding Crowbar up* ONWARDS TO THE MAGICAL WORLD OF EROS!

**America**: ONWARDS! *RUNS OFF*

**England**: ...f***...should we go get them? Or wait til the cops get them?

**Canada**: Im NYAN CAT! MEOW!

**France**: *Sighs* Lets go get em...

**England**: *runs after them on Uni*

**France**: _Why is he floating? WHAT THE FUCK AM I LOOKING AT!_

-_**later-**_

**France**: Look ...* Points to a smashed window at a private school library*

**England**: oh no...*runs over*

**Canada**: *Laying against **America** with only jacket on clinging to him*

**France**:*Covers Nose and looks away* Cute... *Takes a picture with phone*

**England**: f***...

**France**: *Pick up **Canada** bridle style sighing* How odd that my son lost his virginity to his brother... *Shrugs*

**England**: OUR son. *picks up **America*** ...it's definitely fat...

**France**:*Walks to the car and puts **Canada** down*

**Canada**: Mnngh...

**France**: Why must MY son be so cute...

**England**: OUR SON. I GAVE BIRTH TO THEM! *puts **America** in the car*


End file.
